I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
