Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
