Who did Billy Mays play for?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Randomize
