You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
