So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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