he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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