hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
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I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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