do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
When did we convert life to cartoon?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
