their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
