is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
