Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
