I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
