doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
