I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
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Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
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not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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