I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
