Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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