It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize