There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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