I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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