You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
wanna go halves on a baby?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
