and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
