Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
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