Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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