yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
