do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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