that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize