is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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