Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
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