a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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