Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize