If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
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He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
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Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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