Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
