I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock