Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
Me, myself and I
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore