Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
