i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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