I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
This is my gift to your gina
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
