Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize