Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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