just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
