didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
