Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
