You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
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