I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
