I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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