I'm jealous of your bromance
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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