and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
