Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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