Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
