I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
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My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
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Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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