This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
You're a waste of cheezeits
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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