Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
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