i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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